Monday, January 31, 2011

The "never" ending story. . .

Ok so here it is, another year and more trouble. okay last year I couldnt really say anything except about Grandma because I spent the whole year looking for a house to buy. finally in November we moved into a house. It is a good house, great mortgage payments and only 4% interest on the loan.
however, within a week of moving in the trouble started. Carroll is sick again. All through November and December we spent a lot of time at the VA hospital and having tests run. he has cancer again. Now you may notice he had Kidney cancer in 2008 and recovered after a partial nephrectomy. He has skin cancer, but not Melanoma, now he has lung cancer.

So this time, after two months of tests and biopsies, we have a clear diagnosis of SCLC which means small cell lung cancer stage 4, otherwise known as extensive SCLC. It means the cancer has metastasized to more than two other locations. In Carroll's case it is his adreanal gland, abdomen, lung, and brain.

What does that mean? It is inoperable, it is incurable, and it is the most agressive kind of lung cancer.

(deep breath)

All treatments are for quality of life. Chemotherapy actually does well killing the tumors already present and shrinking them, more than 90% have results with strong chemo. The only problem is.. the cancer is so fast growing, it usually grows faster than they can treat it. Also with this type of cancer they usually suggest patients have whole head radiation to PREVENT brain metastasis, but since Carroll already has it... they will try a little stronger radiation. This could extend his quality of life for months.

months.

without treatment this kind of cancer has about 6 to 8 weeks for survival. With treatment 21% are around 10-14 months.

Ofcourse those are only statistics. There are exceptions ofcourse.

Chemo has started and he has lost his hair. I call him Telly Savalas. the radiation of his head starts early in February.

I am overwhelmed, strong for Carroll, worried, freakin' out, sad, mournful, depressed, not real talkative, and germ-a-phobic now.

I don't know why I write this kind of stuff here.

20 comments:

vivian said...

geez val.... why didnt you call me to tell me? I'm sorry. If I can find your phone number I'll call you tomorrow. have you talked to mom? gees.. why didnt you call?!
I love you.
viv

Lisa said...

I am so very sorry - there really are no words to comfort, I know... I'll be praying for you and your husband. I'm sorry...

Suz said...

Val,
I am a friend from your sister's blog. I wrote to tell you how sorry I am to hear of your husband's cancer. We are currently in California where my husband is being treated for pancreatic cancer. Really, there is nothing in my life that has been harder than this. I will keep you both in my prayers, hoping for peace of mind for the two of you.
Fondly,
Suz

Jenny Holiday & Aaron said...

Hi Val..I'm a friend of Viv's.

Just wanted you to know that you both are in our thoughts.

Sending love from the NJ Shore.
xo Jenny & Aaron

Paula Clare said...

Hi Val,
I'm Paula Clare...and I'm a friend of Viv's...just wanted to stop by and let you know that I and my massive world-wide prayer network will be praying for you, Carroll, James and the rest of the fam. So sorry to hear about Tigger too...wow...what a tough time you're having!

I'll keep up with you...and I'll be believing the best for you! Hugs!

Paula Clare

Tamera's Craft Palace said...

I came here from viv's blog...i just wanted to let you know I'll be praying for you and Carroll. God keep you both in His hand. {{{{{hugs}}}}}

Cindy said...

I came here from Viv's blog. I am so sorry about your husband. I and my will be praying for you both.

Susan said...

Hi, I came over from Viv's blog. Just wanted to say hang in there and I'll be saying a prayer for you.

Mahala said...

This is so hard. So many in my family have had cancer and it is a rough thing to deal with, but of course you already know that. My heart, thoughts, prayers, they are all here for you and your husband... My best to you both.
Mahala

Mrs. Cherry Heart said...

Hi Valerie,
I am a friend of your sis Viv.
I am so sorry you and Carroll are going thru this!
We will keep you both in our prayers!

Hugs, Dolly

P.s. don't feel bad writing that on your blog.....we are out here to comfort and support you thru good and bad times!

Hope said...

Like the others, I am over here from viv's blog to send some good thoughts and to let you know that you and your hubby are not alone in this.

Best wishes from the UK.

Natasha Burns said...

Hi Val,
I'm a friend of Viv's. Thinking of you and Carroll, I'm so sorry to hear the news. You're in my thoughts and prayers,
Natasha

Susan said...

So sorry to hear whats going on. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband.

Sending hugs..

Marcia said...

You don't know me, but I came across your blog from a link from a link. It all started because I was looking at adorable stuffed monkeys.

My brother-in-law is receiving treatment for stomach cancer and we have a blog to keep people posted on his progress. The comments and thoughts and prayers he receives are so important to him.

I just wanted you to know that someone is thinking about you and your husband today and sending prayers and positive energy your way.

Anonymous said...

I'm a friend of your sister, Viv.

I can only imagine the heartache you are going through. Praying for you.

bojojoti

Jenny said...

I came to visit from your sisters blog. It sounds like your platter runneth over.

I will add you all to my daily prayer list.

I'm sorry to read of all this.

Kai said...

Like many others who have commented, I'm a blogging friend of Viv's. Valerie, I too am going through chemo (again) and so I really DO understand your fear, your anxiety, your sadness & depression. Only I imagine it's even HARDER when the person who's ill is not YOURSELF, but someone you dearly love. I'll keep you and your husband in my thoughts & in my heart. I'm sending you strong hugs, gentle encouragement, and an invitation to feel FREE and email me any time you need to talk or scream or cry or say those 3 words we all say, "IT'S NOT FAIR!" Kai whose email is kola54@sbcglobal.net

Luv2Shop said...

I came from Vivian's blog! So sorry to hear your news about your husband. You will make it through this, I know because I have been where you are. Stay strong for him and pray hard! You can count on God he will not forsake you. I am now a widow and faith is all that has kept me going! I will remember your family in my prayers!

LiBBy said...

Why do bad things happen to good people? It is the age old question. Life throws huge wrenches~business head first~ into our lives and there is often little we can do but continue to persevere and hope and pray.
Sending a shout up to heaven for you both.
LB

martha brown said...

I'm a friend of Viv's -- I have my fingers crossed for you....xox