Today is Christmas
Oh Christmas! what a guilt trip it is. I want to give to the whole family and I barely got anything for my immediate kin. Our microwave died a month ago so Carroll got a new microwave, he and James made me let them use it instead of letting me put it under the tree. kill joys. So I had to get him another gift so he would have something to open today. (it is 6am) I got him a winter scarf I call it a man-scarf, I wanted the kind men in NY city wear in the winter, classy yet not real long, and manly. I bought one for James too it has been freakin' cold! I also bought them both winter gloves from Cabala's because James cant drive in the bulky ones he has been borrowing from Carroll. (actually I ordered the gloves and a nice fleece jacket for James but they had to be delivered to the store, I got impatient and went and bought one pair of gloves they didn't have them in the other size I bought. So the gloves and jacket are in at the store but I cant get them now. (I didn't have time or money to pick them up yesterday) So I got James an exercise ball. A man one, not the palates woman one. He has been worried about his center flab and wants to work his abs.
I had a hell of a time deciding what to get David, and settled on a Hot Topic gift certificate. That way I know he will get something for himself and not the baby. I also swiped the picture of him, Wendi and Nicholas visiting Santa and printed it out on photo paper and put it in a "Me and Santa" frame.
I bought Wendi a small Eeyore ( she likes him best) I should have sent something more but I couldn't I spent more on Nicholas. He got three outfits. one is jammies, one is a short and hoodie set but the hoodie is sleeveless, and an adorable three piece suit with a tie and a hankie in the pocket! It has pin striped pants it is so adorable! Also me, Ethan and Colling made him a no-sew blanket of Tigger and a no-sew pillow.
I sent a raving mushy letter to Wendi's parents thanking them for helping David, Wendi and Nicholas start out by living with them.
The kids (Ethan, Collin and Isabelle) made plaster of paris gifts for everyone here and snow globes. So me, Carroll, James and Vanessa are all getting those for Christmas from the kids. Making crafts with me and their daddy was part of their Christmas gifts but they dint know that.
I made Isabelle a no-sew pillow also. We got her a baby doll that babbles baby sounds, and an outfit of a corduroy jumper with a turtle neck shirt.
Ethan is getting one of the snow globes he made, a science kit to grow his own crystals, and his own backgammon set. (we play acey deucey).
Collin is getting a play set of a Navy ship, airplane and truck with some soldiers and another big set of soldiers, and a snow globe he made.
Vanessa is getting the trinkets the kids made, one of them has Isabelle's hand prints, and I gave her two pair of earrings.
I didn't get anything for anyone else. Not even mom or dad. not for Gramma or Jerry or Uncle Nick and Aunt Midge, or anyone else.
Like I said in the beginning what a guilt trip. I had to get a payday loan to get what I got.
But the tree is up and lighted, the decorations are out and it looks like Christmas here, no snow though. (I dint miss it)

I did have to give myself an attitude adjustment about Christmas. I am not sure how to do Christmas morning without kids or family. Being the Grandma on Daddy's side means I wait until last. The kids have Christmas at home and then most of the day with their other grandparents and great grandparents and I am last. At least with James living here I am still one the list.
James is working today until 3:30pm the kids will be here sometime between 1 and 3pm. I hated it the first year here waiting and pacing all day for the kids to get her to have Christmas, I hated it that's why we went to Florida last year.
This year I just needed to re-think it all. I asked people at work, "what do old people do on Christmas? I mean with no kids running down the stairs and yelling Santa came? What do they do on Christmas morning?" The consensuses was not church because they would have gone the night before.
So I decided Carroll and I will have a breakfast quiche and then watch "It's a Wonderful Life" and maybe play Scrabble. After James comes home from work and the kids are here we will have Christmas gifts. We are having a small ham and James is having a steak (ham is salty) the kids would have eaten all morning with their Christmas breakfast and their Christmas dinner in the afternoon.
This is the first year in 27 years I have not done stockings. Not even for me and Carroll because I didn't have the money. I did buy some M&Ms and Kisses though.
I woke up like a kid all night excited about Santa, I guess. I woke up at 3am and sat up for a while, then went back to sleep. I woke up again around 5am and have been up since. I am going to need a nap.
This is long, I am done for now. I will tell you later what I got for Christmas, besides the three books I bought myself. "Giving" by Bill Clinton, "The Enemy Within" about prejudices, and "A Traitor to His Class" about FDR.
Chao

New Year

My goodness I have neglected you! It has been almost a year since I last wrote anything. I use MySpace for checking up on others. I really only keep this so I can visit Viv's page.
I dont have anything to say because I just mailed out a year end letter to everyone.
I just wanted to update.
Carroll and I will have our 6th anniversary next week and because of Christmas and being poor we will not be doing anything again. Well, it must be ok, out of three husbands I have been married and living with him longer than the other two. Kenny and I were married 10 years but we really were only together 2 years ( that includes the year we were actually married and living together.)
Larry and I lived together 11 years but again were only married 1 1/2 years of that.
So here we are Carroll and I have been together 10 years but have actually been married 6 of them now. Maybe I need a new husband. LOL
I will wait until he dies . . . or I kill him. :) Actually he isn't allowed to die Unless I kill him.

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better now

Okay so we figured out how to stop Carroll from wasting all the money for the rent. I made him ask SS for paper checks so we have to cash it get the money for the rent and then get a money order. It worked this month. Let's hope it works in the future.
David has gone back to Florida. Right now, he is driving there in his 2008 Impala SS. Wendi's mom co-signed for him. (Why?) anyway, the baby is due November 27th. (Thanksgiving?) It's a boy and his name will be Nicolas Wyatt Long. (no "H" in Nicolas) .
James is still blown up like a f@&*#ing balloon! His Kidney's arent working right, he has Nephrotic Syndrome but we dont know why or how to fix it because he says he is too poor to go get the $1000.00 Blood tests and ultra sound done. I keep telling him get it done, and apply for charity. It isn't going to be cheaper to be on Dialysis for the rest of his life either!
The grandkids are fine. Isabelle is trying to learn how to walk. Collin is a brat and whines like Ethan. I keep to telling Ethan to stop acting like a 2 year old. Sometimes he listens. He is getting older.
I am ok. My job is ok.
Carroll is sitting here bothering me. So I am gonna stop now.

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Medical Update

Ok, So Carroll had his surgery to remove the mass from his Kidney last Thursday. All went well. He was even released from the hospital by Sunday. Then at home he really didnt need as much help as I thought. He wasn't eating very good and then started throwing up everything he did eat. 2 bites of a sandwich, a couple cheerios. Anyway after a week yesterday I took him to the urgent care at the VA. (emergency) They admitted him. I guess during ll this time he hadnt been having bowel movements either. He didnt tell me that. Well so they admitted him for being Full of Shit! LOL Can't help it but laugh. I never heard of it before. Mom says it isnt funny. But it is....I already knew he was full of shit, now a doctor confirms it. LOL Okay, Sorry. It's not funny and could have been serious. but he was given tons of stuff to make him go #2 and he did. So they might let him come home tonight.

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Medical things

So we went to the VA again Friday and talked to the doctor about his kidney cancer stuff. He has two surgeries coming up in the next month. This month they will go in and shoot dye into the one with the mass, and blast the kidney stone in the other one and get that out to make sure that kidney is ok, just in case. Then he will go back and have the mass removed from the other kidney. Then he should be all better. Except ofcourse for the COPD. He will be fine.
Me, I started my new job and there are many programs I have to learn. I willo really like all the stuff once I really know what I am doing. But I am still sick. Not as bad but the phelmy cough hasnt lessoned any and now I have a sore throat from it all. It gets really sore in the afternoon and evening I just want to cry. I take all kinds of medicine for it and now have some Cleoreseptic(?) spray, cough drops and am taking lots of aspirin. My jaw hurt so I went to the dentist and it is just muscle inflamation due to my clenching and grinding my teeth at night. Once I get my teeth cleaned he will make me a night guard for my mouth. The aspirin is for that really.
So we are messes but ok. I dont know why I am writing this on here. i didnt realloy wasnt it to be journal like. No bad news type of thing. But Vivian is always waiting for me to post something and that happens to be the only things going on right now. Except James living with us because Vanessa kicked him out. David needing money for the state, and other such bothers. James' staying here is NOT a bother I am glad he is here. I want him to stay. Carroll likes him too.
Well thats it for now sisters (the only people that read this)
I will bid you adeiu

Belated Happy New Year

So it's the New year. Dec. 31st I had the day off it was mine and Carroll's 5th wedding anniversary and we spent most of it in the VA hospital with the poor man getting a colonoscopy. I was sick, phelmy cough, sinus headache, tired and just ill. When we got home, after hours, I went to bed. I woke up around 11 pm here and watched the ball drop in NYC and then fell back asleep. It was thrilling!
I guess 5 years is the one that doesnt matter anymore if you exchange cards and gifts or go out to eat or something. Atually I was really sick and didnt want to do anything. He was all drugged up, and we have all these medical things to think about.